


let's cause a little trouble

by arzenpai



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M, Mafia Generation of Miracles, OR IS HE, except kuroko hes a lovable kindergarten teacher
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-10
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-21 09:53:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16574252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arzenpai/pseuds/arzenpai
Summary: When Akashi mentions that he has a romantic date, the other Miracles are desperate to know who the (un)lucky person is.They expect a model, or even a princess worthy of Akashi's emperor persona----naturally, it's a disaster.





	let's cause a little trouble

**Author's Note:**

> i unearthed my evernote account after two long years and i found old unposted fanfiction lmao  
> here is one of them

When the Miracles found out that Akashi was dating someone, they all set out to check the person out for themselves. Just to see if the person was up to their standards. Or just to be sure that Akashi wasn't blackmailing the person. What they didn't expect was an angelic kindergarten teacher who ran a family bakery.

The mansion lounge was quiet. Or, well, it was as quiet as it could be with the Miracles gathered in a single room. Aomine and Kise were in front of the fireplace, arguing which type of gun would work better against a gorilla. Murasakibara was loudly munching on chips while Midorima scolded him for getting crumbs on the Persian rug that was no doubt his lucky item for the day. It was just a normal day in the life of the inner circle of the strongest Family in Japan.

When Akashi walked in, he was assaulted by a crying Kise. "Akashicchi! Tell Aominecchi that he's wrong!" He knew better than to grab the redhead by his clothes, so he settled with hovering nearby, his eyes still watery. "A machine gun would work more wouldn't it?"

Aomine scowled from his position on the floor. "Shut up, Kise! You know a sniper would kill it in one shot! Right, Akashi?"

Akashi raised an eyebrow at their antics. "A gun's usefulness depends on how it is handled, Ryota, Daiki. You both should already know that." He looked down to adjust a sleeve, and that was when Kise noticed that he was dressed particularly different tonight. As the leader of the Miracles, he was always dressed nicely in a dark suit that was tailored to fit him, but tonight, he was dressed casually. Or as casual Akashi could be, with a cashmere turtleneck and a scarf around his neck.

Kise blinked. "Akashicchi, are you going undercover tonight? Or was there was a hit mission we needed to do...?" As he spoke the last sentence, a bit of fear entered his eyes. Akashi was known to be a slave driver, especially when they neglected their duties. Which happened more often than they'd like to admit, especially when it was Kise and Aomine.

But the redhead shook his head, dispelling some of Kise's worries. "No need to worry, Ryota. I merely have a personal appointment to attend to." He raised an eyebrow at the curious looks he got from the others. "I have a date, simply put."

The silence in the room was only broken by the crackling of the fire. Of course, that silence didn't last long.

"Akashicchi has a _what_?!"

"Whoa, Akashi, it's a big-boobed babe, right?"

"Aka-chin found someone he doesn't want to crush?"

"Not that it's any of my business, but are you really going out on a date, Akashi?"

Akashi frowned and held up a hand. "Yes, Ryota, I have a date. Daiki, you really shouldn't objectify women like that. Yes, Atsushi, I found someone I am fond of. And Shintarou, stop making it sound like I'm a heartless monster." The cold smile he gave them after that made them all doubt what he just said, but they were quieted, and that was all Akashi wanted. "Now, I will be out until late tonight, and unless an emergency comes up, you will not contact me. Understand?"

Once he had their promises (although he knew that those really didn't count for much), he bid them goodbye and left in one of his flashier cars in the garage.

Of course, when Kise was sure that Akashi would be too far away to hear anything he would say, he pulled Aomine and Midorima into a huddle, much to the displeasure of the green-haired doctor. "So, what do you guys think?" His amber eyes gleamed in the light of the fire, further emphasizing the mischievous and gleeful look in them. "What do you think Akashicchi's date would be like?"

Aomine gestured in front of his chest with his hands. "Probably a model. With a nice rack-- ow! Kise, what the fuck was that for?!" he screeched when the blonde reached over to whack the back of his head.

Kise frowned. "Be serious for once, Aominecchi! This woman might end up as our first lady!"

Midorima scoffed and pushed his glasses up his nose. "It's not really any of our business, is it? Kise, you should stop pushing your nose into Akashi's business. It never goes well."

The blonde pouted at the scolding but then he grinned and slung an arm around Midorima's shoulders, something the bespectacled man tried to shrug off. "Oh come on, Midorimacchi! I know you're curious!"

Murasakibara spoke from his seat on the couch. "Maybe it's a really nice girl who'd give him chocolate. Aka-chin likes éclairs, right?" His lazy drawl showed his disinterest in the matter, but he kept his eyes on them, so maybe he really was a bit curious.

Aomine scowled at the purple-haired giant. "Akashi's not like you, Murasakibara."

Kise groaned. "And he also isn't like you, Aominecchi!" He ignored Aomine's loud protest and hummed thoughtfully, his chin cupped between his fingers. "Knowing Akashicchi, it's probably someone elegant. Someone who can captivate. Someone beautiful, of course. Someone... Someone who's strong."

Midorima nodded in agreement. "Which means it's probably someone who runs in the same circles as he does. An assassin, maybe?"

They all paused to imagine Akashi with an equally frightening lady and all shuddered at that thought. "...m-maybe Akashicchi shouldn't date just yet," Kise concluded with a shaky laugh.

The door opened, and they all (except for Murasakibara) flinched and looked fearfully at the door. Akashi had the tendency to appear out of nowhere whenever they were all up to no good. But luckily, it was just Momoi. She could be pretty frightening as well, but nowhere near Akashi.

"A-Ah, Momoicchi! Perfect timing!" Kise jumped from the floor and grabbed the pink-haired date analyst. "We need your help!"

Momoi blinked at Kise. Then she frowned when she spotted how Aomine was looking at her eagerly. "Ki-chan... What are you and Dai-chan up to?" She started to look at them with a suspicious gleam in her eyes. "Is it something that will make Akashi-kun mad again? You really should stop angering him!"

Kise waved his hands to reassure her. "Don't worry, don't worry! It's nothing bad." He smiled widely. "But did you know Akashicchi is on a date right now? Do you know who it is, by any chance?"

Surprise flickered through Momoi's pink eyes. "Eh? Akashi-kun is?" Her surprise was understandable; as the head of the Miracles, Akashi was a very well-sought after bachelor in the underworld, even without considering his reputation as the Akashi Conglomerate's CEO. But most definitely because of that, he had to be careful with who he associated with because of death threats and dangerous connections. When he went on 'dates' it was usually to seduce a needed target or more usually, to get information. "Is it for a mission, Ki-chan?"

Kise shook his head. "That's the thing! He said it was so personal, so it must be a real date, right?" Momoi didn't know anything about it either, so it must be someone that Akashi really found interesting, if he was keeping the person to himself. "Can you help us find out who it is? Midorimacchi said it would be an assassin but I don't think Akashicchi would date someone like that... Right?" Even he sounded unsure.

Momoi worried her lip. She obviously didn't want to be a part of whatever Kise and Aomine were planning, but she _was_ curious as well. If there really were someone who had truly caught the redhead's attention, then she wanted to know who that person was, and if she could actually handle being together with someone like Akashi. "...Okay, fine, I'll help you. But what _I_ say, goes. I don't want you two idiots to get me into trouble too!"

Aomine scowled at her but didn't deny it, and nor did Kise. "So what are we gonna do, huh, Satsuki?" he grouched

Midorima pushed his glasses up his nose. He was trying to appear nonchalant, but the tense line of his shoulder betrayed his hesitant curiosity. "This wasn't my idea, but I suppose I can accompany you. But I really don't care whether Akashi is dating anyone." That might as well be a yes, so Kise nodded with a wide grin playing on his lips.

Momoi smiled, surveying them all with her her hands on her hips. "I know exactly what to do."

* * *

"Satsuki, this was a _bad_ idea," Aomine hissed under his breath as he crouched on the ground beside Akashi's red Lambhorgini. Kise was squished beside him, and Murasakibara and Midorima with pressed up beside each other outside the second door. "What are you even _doing_?"

Momoi was crouched inside the car, making sure her head wasn't easily seen through the car's windows. "Keep your voice down, Dai-chan! I'm looking through Akashi-kun's GPS to see where he went last night. Maybe one of them is the address of the woman he saw.

Kise brightened. "Good thinking, Momocchi!"

Midorima glanced over his shoulder. "But would Akashi really do that? He wouldn't be this careless with anyone he genuinely cares for."

Momoi stopped scrolling through the GPS screen and frowned. "We don't have anything else to go on, Midorin. I don't want to try hacking into his files; he'll know." She sat up and crossed her arms. "Do you have any ideas?"

Murasakibara swallowed his bite of maiubo. "Can't we just ask Aka-chin? This is too bothersome, Sacchin." He looked sleepier than usual, and maybe that was because they all had to wake up early to start planning. Today was the only time they could do this because Akashi was sleeping in late in preparation for his solo mission tomorrow, and he would be sleeping until late afternoon.

Four pairs of eyes turned to him. "Mukkun, I still want to live and possibly get married. That will not happen if Akashi-kun tears into me," Momoi said with a nearly hysterical smile.

The GPS screen beeped once and Momoi returned to tinkering with it. "He went to the Amici restaurant uptown before stopping by the Royal Theater. Before that..." She hummed. "He made a couple of stops, but I don't recognize any of these places. They're mostly civilian spots."

Midorima sighed and rose to his knees to peer at the screen over Momoi's shoulder. "He _was_ careful, because he knew idiots would be butting their noses into his business."

Kise gave him an annoyed side-glance. "Midorimacchi, you're one of those idiots," he reminded.

The green-haired male looked affronted, and Momoi intervened before they made a ruckus, because that would definitely wake Akashi up. "We definitely don't have enough time to look through all these places. And Midorin is right; Akashi-kun would cover his tracks. We have to figure out which of these places is their meeting point, and start there."

Aomine yawned and closed his eyes. "You do it, Satsuki. You're the analyst, not me."

Kise gasped when he heard that. "Did Aominecchi just admit to being an idiot?" He pressed his hand to his chest in an exaggerated theatrical gesture. "I never thought I'd live to see that day!"

As expected, that served to do nothing but rile up Aomine, who then proceeded to grab Kise and lock him in a choke hold. "Damn you, Kise!"

Murasakibara watched them with bored eyes, and Midorima sighed in part irritation and part exasperation. "You two idiots are going to get us killed, one of these days."

Momoi ignored them bickering beside her and focused on the list of places Akashi made a stop yesterday. The redhead was very careful, and he even bothered to drop by places that he usually went to. The question was: did he do that to throw off potential stalkers, or did he actually use one of these places as a meeting place with his new beau? 'If she was a civilian, then he would definitely pick her up somewhere away from the other Families' territories. But if what Midorin said was right...' The possibilities were too many, and Momoi was starting to doubt that they could do this.

"Ah. Sacchin, that's the bakery Aka-chin always buys pastries from." Murasakibara leaned over the car door and pointed to a confectionary store that Akashi had stopped at last night. "Let's go there, their cream puffs are good."

Momoi blinked. Murasakibara had broken her concentration, and her trains of thought all vanished in a blink of the eye. "Mukkun," she scolded sternly, "this isn't the time to be thinking of sweets!" She pouted. "We need to be focusing on finding where Akashi-kun's beau..." Suddenly, she gasped, the realization coming to her. Akashi didn't always bring home pastries and sweets for Murasakibara. In fact, he had always been against the purple-haired man's intake of sugar. But then he suddenly began to bring home paper bags filled with all sorts of sugary treats, saying that Murasakibara deserved 'a reward for a job well done.' Of course, Kise whined that he also wanted something from Akashi, but was hastily shut down when Akashi reminded him of his many mess-ups. It was the last time it was ever brought up, Akashi had ensured that.

A triumphant grin stretched Momoi's lips. "Mukkun, you're amazing! Dai-chan, Ki-chan, Midorin, I've got the place!" She pumped both of her fists into the air and climbed out of the car, making sure that she put back everything in its proper place. "We just need to take a little road trip."

Kise mirrored her glee. "Nice, Momocchi! Where are we going?" He stood up and dusted himself off, offering a hand to Midorima, who promptly ignored it.

Momoi took out her phone and set her own GPS to the address of the bakery. "A place called Seirin Bakeshop. It's a place Akashi-kun frequents, so we should he able to get some clues. If we're lucky, we might even meet the lady herself!" Her excitement showed through; she was nearly vibrating. "Now, chop chop, you guys! Ki-chan, you're driving! I don't want Dai-chan to get us involved in another high-speed chase with the cops."

* * *

Seirin Bakeshop was a quaint little place with large windows that offered a view to the spacious interior of the shop. It was a bakery that doubled as a cafe, and from outside, the Miracles could see people of all ages either seated around tables or looking through the offered pastries. The second they entered the place, they were hit with the scent of vanilla essence and the homey feeling that emanated from the counter.

Momoi walked up to the counter with a frown. As calming as the cafe was, why was the counter empty? There was no one manning the cash register; that felt like lousy management. Kise came up beside her. "I don't see anyone who fits the standards," he said, letting his amber eyes roam around the cafe itself.  There were two waiters serving the seated customers. One of them was a black-haired male who seemed to be reciting a joke to the family he was serving, and the other was a brown-haired boy who was shyly smiling as he took the order of a couple sitting particularly close to each other.

Midorima adjusted his glasses. "For once, I agree with Kise. They people here all seem... _normal_." And by 'normal', he meant 'civilian.' He was still of the mindset that Akashi wouldn't date anyone outside his circle of influence. Dating a civlian was too risky, and not to mention dangerous for the person herself.

Momoi frowned. "Did we get it wrong, then?"

Aomine scowled as he looked around. There was a kindergarten right next door, so there were plenty of mothers with their children around the cafe-slash-bakery. He didn't particularly like children, especially with how noisy they were. They reminded him of Kise, most of the time. It was obvious that he didn't enjoy being in this place. Midorima shared his expression; there was no way Akashi's beau would be in this kind of place-- maybe they just used it as a meeting area? "Excuse me, but if you're not yet sure what you want, please take a table and let a waiter attend to you," a voice suddenly spoke from the counter. They all jumped and whirled to face the mysterious speaker, and was surprised to see a blue-haired male standing right in front of where Momoi was standing. They were all hit with the feeling of having the rug pulled out from under them-- they hadn't felt the male approach at all. And for trained mafiosi, they were all unsettled and itching to grab their concealed weapons.Aomine was the first to speak, pointing at the male with a finger. "You! Since when were you there!?"

The blue-haired male blinked at them. "I was already here before you entered the cafe." He held up a notepad, already poised to write down their orders. "Will you be ordering at the counter?"

At the sight of the different types of cakes, cupcakes, cookies, and pastries behind the glass case, Murasakibara strode forward immediately. "I want one of everything," he promptly said, a petulant tone to his voice. Whenever he tried to order like this in shops, they always gave him an odd look before asking him if he was serious. And he was prepared to fight for his pastries, if needed be. But to his surprise, the blue-haired barista only nodded before scribbling down his order.

"Although the cream puffs are still being cooled. Are you in a hurry or would you be okay with waiting?"

Murasakibara blinked in surprise. "Sacchin, we're okay with waiting, right?" He looked over his shoulder, to where the pink-haired woman was still blinking as she took in her surroundings. "Huh? ...oh, yeah, sure," she murmured, much to the tall male's glee.

The blue-haired barista nodded. "Alright then. Please take a seat, I'll bring you your orders in a while." He then turned to the glass case containing the pastries and began to take one from each of the trays. Muarasakibara followed his movements with an enraptured gaze.

Aomine huffed. "I'm going home, I can't stand kids." Momoi grabbed his arm before he could take a single step. "Dai-chan, stop! We said we'd be out the entire day, remember?! It'd be suspicious if you suddenly show up at home!" She had agreed to this plan because of her own curiosity, and she was going to make sure none of the Miracles screwed this up by letting Akashi realize that they were out to look for his lover.Kise caught the inquisitive gave of the blue-haired barista and began pushing them to a nearby table. "Come on, Aominecchi, Momocchi! Let's not cause a ruckus, alright? Midorimacchi, you too."

Once they were seated, Kise leaned closer to Momoi. "Do you really think no one here would be Akashicchi's lover?" He continued to look around. "What about her? She's really pretty." The pink-haired discreetly turned to look at the person Kise was pointing to. "She has this alluring air around her."

Momoi pressed her lips together. The woman was blonde, with green eyes and pink-framed glasses perched on her nose. She was talking animatedly with a black-haired man who was gently smiling at her. But then a red-haired waiter came up to the table, and the blonde tugged him down to a kiss, something the redhead obviously didn't expect, judging with the way he suddenly pulled away with a yelled "Alex!" and red cheeks. "...I don't think Akashi-kun would go for someone who's so openly flirtatious..." Their redhead boss was very possessive, so a lover who would just kiss someone else like that didn't seem right.

Aomine huffed. "I don't see what's wrong with her."

Kise made a face at him. "That's only because she's your type, Aominecchi. Focus!" he hissed.

Murasakibara munched on the potato chips in his hands. "What about him?" he asked, looking towards the blue-haired male behind the counter, who was still in the middle of preparing Murasakibara's pastries. "He's someone I don't want to crush."

They looked at him with exasperation in their eyes. "Don't be ridiculous, Murasakibara. You're only saying that because he was nice to you," Midorima reasoned with a roll of his eyes.

Kise blinked at Murasakibara. "You know, Murasakibaracchi must be on to something! What if Akashicchi's lover is a guy?" His eyes sparkled, as if this was a revelation that would change everything.

They all stared at him in surprise, because they completely hadn't thought was even a possibility. But was it really? Akashi had no qualms seducing a male for a mission, but did he really swing that way? He never really stated outright that he preferred only women, only that his type of woman would be an elegant one. Would it differ if he liked men as well?

Aomine looked away, still looking rather bored. "Great. The guy likes dick instead of boobs, that makes things harder." He rolled his eyes. "Most of the workers here are dudes. How are we even gonna find the right person?"

Midorima crossed his arms. "I told you this was a waste of time."

But Kise wasn't deterred. He kept on looking around, and his gaze landed on a gray-haired male seated on the nearest table. His posture was lax but not careless, and he was reading his book with an air of mystery around him, as if he didn't want to be disturbed. But that only made people look at him, Kise noticed. There was a group of high school girls looking at him from afar, stars in their eyes. "What about him?" he asked.

Four pairs of eyes followed his line of sight. Midorima ran a critical eye over the male. He did look like someone who would catch Akashi's interest. "It's a possibility, if only he were in the business."

"Excuse me, please don't stare at Mayuzumi-san, he gets rather upset when people do that," came a familiar monotonous voice from beside Aomine.

The tan-skinned male jumped in surprise (and so did the other Miracles), banging his knee against the table. "What the fuck!" He glared at the blue-haired batista standing by their table. The guy suddenly appeared out of nowhere! Again! "Stop doing that, you piece of shit!"

The male only blinked before handing Murasakibara his paper bag of pastries. "My apologies, I didn't mean to startle you."

The gray-haired male from the next table looked over with a raised eyebrow. "Tetsuya, you really should stop waiting on tables. You just scare everyone." He ran his gaze over the seated Miracles and Momoi was surprised to see a flicker of recognition behind those bored eyes.

The blue-haired barista, now they know as Tetsuya, shook his head. "We're understaffed today, Mayuzumi-san. Kagami-kun and Hyuuga-san are busy.

The Miracles watched with enraptured gazes as the two males interacted. "Is that why you're not at the kindergarten?" He took the cup of coffee from the tray that Tetsuya was holding and took a sip.

Tetsuya nodded. "Yes, but they'll manage without me."

Mayuzumi chuckled and to their surprise, smiled at the blue-haired male. "You're more suited to be a teacher, that much I can say."

Tetsuya smiled as well. "Is that so?"

The same thought ran through the Miracles' minds: 'This is the guy!' Mayuzumi fit Kise's earlier criteria. Most of them, anyway. There was an elegance to how he carried himself, and Momoi could feel as if this guy would fit in perfectly in their world. And the way he talked to that blue-haired batista... he was definitely a regular to this place.

When Tetsuya walked away from their tables, Momoi drew herself up and approached the gray-haired male. "U-Um, excuse me! Mayuzumi-san, right?"

She was trusting her instinct that was telling her that this male was connected to Akashi, one way or another. The male looked at her with a bored gaze. "What do you want?"Momoi drew a deep breath. If she was wrong, then this could go badly. "By any chance, are you acquainted with Akashi-kun?"

To her surprise, Mayuzumi scowled. "Unfortunately, yes. Why are you asking?" He then held up a hand. "No, never mind, I don't care. Just tell that brat to stay away from the bakeshop. He ruins the atmosphere."

Momoi blinked. "Wait, what?" So they were wrong? Or was Akashi courting a hard-to-get individual? They hadn't taken into account the possibility of Akashi failing to seduce someone, but was it possible after all?

Mayuzumi closed his book with a snap. He looked awfully irritated. "Don't involve me in whatever you lot are doing." He pushed his chair back and stood up, looking over his shoulder. "Tetsuya, I'm leaving! Talk to these idiots, will you? They're asking about Akashi." Without even a goodbye, he turned on his heel and exited the cafe.

Kise groaned and dropped his head into his hands. "That went well. And we were so sure!" Even he looked rather put-out.

Aomine snorted. "That guy was an ass, I'd rather Akashi not be dating him."

"Excuse me, are you really looking for Akashi-kun?"

Again, they all jumped when they realized that Tetsuya was standing beside Momoi. "I told you not to do that! Why do you keep doing that?!" Aomine shook his fist at the blank-faced male. "One more time and I really might end up bashing your head in!"

Kise stood up and shoved Aomine to the side. "Does Akashicchi go here frequently?" If Mayuzumi wasn't the redhead's lover, then maybe this guy knew.

Tetsuya blinked at him. "Sorry, but why are you asking? I'm not really supposed to give information about our customers."

Midorima pushed his glasses up his nose. "Was that man Akashi's lover?"

Tetsuya looked towards the door. "Mayuzumi-san? No, I don't think so. You've seen how Mayuzumi-san hates Akashi-kun." Was it just Momoi, or did he look amused at their question? "To answer your question, Midorima-san, yes, Akashi-kun goes here often. I believe he brings home pastries that Kagami-kun makes."They all immediately convened. "Is it possible that it's this Kagami guy?" Kise asked.

Midorima shook his head. "We have nothing to go on if it's just a name. Unless Momoi can immediately pull out information on him?"

Murasakibara tossed an eclair into his mouth. "If he's as nice as Tetsuya-chin, then probably."

Aomine rubbed his hand down his face. "Murasakibara, I swear to god, if you like the dude so much, then you date him."

"I'd prefer it if you didn't, Atsushi."

They all froze at the familiar silky voice coming from behind them. Slowly, they turned to face Akashi, who was standing right beside Tetsuya. Unsurprisingly, he was smiling that signature smile that meant someone was about to be killed. Usually it was directed at Aomine and Kise, but this time, it was directed at all of them.

"A-A-A-Akashicchi... W-W-We can explain!" Kise waved his hands in a hysterical gesture. "We just wanted to see what your lover would be like!"

Akashi's expression softened into disappointment. "I didn't expect you'd be part of this, Shintarou." Midorima flinched and opened his mouth to defend himself, but Akashi had already diverted his attention elsewhere. He sidled by up to Tetsuya, sliding an arm around his waist. "They didn't bother you too much, did they, Tetsuya?

"Wait, what?!"

Tetsuya smiled gently at Akashi and shook his head. "Other than Mayuzumi-san, they didn't bother anyone, Akashi-kun. You shouldn't be too hard on them."

Akashi hummed as he glanced over. He was leaning closer and closer to Tetsuya, and was currently burying his nose into the male's blue hair. "Is that so?" The scene looked oddly intimate, and Momoi was left wondering how long Akashi and Tetsuya had been going out, if Akashi had no qualms initiating contact in public.

Kise's amber eyes sparkled. "So this really is Akashicchi's lover, huh?" He grinned and bounded up to Tetsuya. "It's a pleasure to meet you! I'm Kise Ryouta."

Tetsuya continued to smile. It was a nice change from his deadpan expression from before. "It's a pleasure to meet Akashi-kun's co-workers. I'm Kuroko Tetsuya, please take care of me." He bowed the best he could while still in Akashi's hold.

Murasakibara continued to eat. "I approve, Aka-chin. I already like Kuro-chin."

Aomine squinted at the male. "What do you see in this guy, Akashi? He's practically invisible!" He seemed to be still annoyed with how Tetsuya kept on surprising him before.

Momoi gasped and slapped Aomine's arm. "Dai-chan, don't be rude!" She feared for Aomine's life, especially considering how Akashi was looking at him from over Tetsuya's head. "I'm sure Kuroko-kun is a lovely person!"

"That he is, Satsuki." Akashi tightened his hold on Tetsuya's waist. "Tetsuya, believe it or not, will soon be my bride, actually."

Matching looks of disbelief were on the Miracles' faces. Was Akashi joking? Akashi never joked, he was literally unable to joke about something. Were they supposed to take this at face value? How long had Akashi and Tetsuya been together, if he was already thinking of marriage? A year? Two? Three? Why had they never noticed this?

Tetsuya frowned at that. "I haven't even said yes yet, Akashi-kun. Please don't lead on your friends."

Akashi raised an eyebrow at him. "Oh? Would you say no to me, Tetsuya?"

 

Surprising them even further, Tetsuya nodded. "If Akashi-kun gets in the way of my job, then yes, I will decline your offer." They watched with bated breath-- Akashi never took no for an answer, even from those close to him. "I happen to love my job and not want to just be a housewife."

But Akashi only laughed, a deep throaty sound that they rarely heard. "Ah, Tetsuya. I would never get in between you and your job."

Kise blinked. "Uh, what do you do, Kuroko-kun? Is it just here?"

Tetsuya turned to them with a small smile that made his eyes look warm. "I'm also a teacher at the kindergarten next door."

The twist in Aomine's features showed what he thought about that. Momoi, however, gasped, a hand flying to her chest; that was adorable! It was completely unexpected, considering Akashi's indifference towards children, but that was really adorable! "That's wonderful, Kuroko-kun!"

Tetsuya smiled at them. "Thank you, Momoi-san."

Momoi froze. "W-Wait, how did you... How did you know my name?" She was sure she had never mentioned it. And now that she thought about it, Tetsuya had addressed Midorima earlier by his name.

An odd look crossed Tetsuya's eyes, but he retained his smile. "Akashi-kun has mentioned everyone at least once. About how Aomine-kun always ogles women, how Kise-kun likes cherries, how Momoi-san is very good at her job, how Midorima-kun always has his Oha-Asa items, and how Murasakibara-kun adores the bakeshop's sweets." He curled his fingers over Akashi's hand on his hip.

Akashi chuckled. "I'm not surprised you managed to remember those, Tetsuya. As expected of you." For the first time, there was a dangerous gleam in his eyes, and the others could understand why. That kind of observational skill and memory could post a threat to their Family.

"Oi, Kuroko! Stop smooching with Akashi and get back to work! We need someone back in the kitchen!" A bespectacled male with sharp eyes spoke from the counter. He was giving Akashi a dirty look, and that was understandable.

Akashi responded with a similar hostility in his eyes. "My apologies, Junpei. I'll return Tetsuya to you now." He turned to Tetsuya. "I'll see you next time, Tetsuya. Remember your promise."

Tetsuya rolled his eyes. "As long as Akashi-kun remembers his." He pressed a chaste kiss to Akashi's cheek before bowing to the others. "Please excuse me."

Akashi then turned to his subordinates, crossing his arms with a dark look in his eyes. "Well?"

Kise was shaking, his smile frozen on his face. Aomine looked towards him and pointed. "It was Kise's idea!"

Kise paled further. "Momocchi was the one who found this place!"

Momoi gasped, indignation coloring her cheeks. "Ki-chan! How could you?" This kind of betrayal was unforgivable!

Akashi's devilish smile didn't waver. "Come now, there's no need to point fingers. You're all in this together, aren't you?" he slowly drawled, enunciating each syllable with danger in his tone.

They knew they were all fucked.

**Author's Note:**

> IMAGINE KUWOKO AND ALL THE WITTLE BBIES  
> (but is he really just a teacher huehue)  
> behind the scenes:
> 
> Matching looks of disbelief were on the Miracles' faces. Was Akashi joking? Akashi never joked, he was literally unable to joke about something. Were they supposed to take this at face value? How long had Akashi and Tetsuya been together, if he was already thinking of marriage? A year? Two? Three? Why had they never noticed this?
> 
> Tetsuya frowned at that. "I haven't even said yes yet, Akashi-kun. Please don't lead on your friends."
> 
> Akashi raised an eyebrow at him. "I am absolute, Tetsuya." Tetsuya deadpanned. "Edi wow."
> 
> join me at [@arzenpai_](http://www.twitter.com/arzenpai_)


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